Loosing Steam

Well, its one of those days. The kind where you have a thousand things to do, and none of them intrest you. I've got so much to do I'm ready to go nuts, and yet, I can't bring myself to do any of it. I guess its an endorphin low cause I ate a bunch of crap last night, and didn't get to work out today. I was reading my previous post and wondering how I can feel this way when at other times I have so much passion. Thyroid, brain, some other malfunctioning organ? Maybe. Or maybe I'm just to busy doing a lot of pointless crap to get to my end goal, and I don't have enough meaning in my life. If I were a professor, I'd be set. I would have spare time for philanthropic pursuits, I would convey knowledge and influence students daily, and I wouldn't have to worry about money. Right now I'm in quite the opposite situation. I've got 4-7 years to go before being a prof, and I'm running out of steam. I know the ultimate goal is worth it, I just forget some times. I need more short term things that I can get a feeling of accomplishment from. All these long term goals and no short term are the problem I think. I'm just SOOOOO busy, I don't know how to do it. I've got all these long term goals that are about complete, and they HAVE to be completed soon. So I can't start anything else.

Oh well. Don't even have any good writing in me today, just whining. Guess I'll get back to research and push on through. Hopefully after tomorrows workout I'll be re-energized.

Peace and Love