The reality of apathy...
I had a most interesting and fortunately unamazing experience tonight. I was sitting in the car outside Harris Teeter waiting for Evie who was inside. Two twenty something guys came walking out, and as they passed a shopping cart someone had carelessly left by the entrance, it began to move. First it spun around slowly, and then headed out into the road through the parking lot. The two looked at it, laughed, and moved on without stopping it. I'm sure they assumed it would hit a curb and stop; or possibly a parked car, but thats not there problem.
Meanwhile, I'm sitting in the car thinking the same thing. It looked as though it would hit a curb, but then it turned slightly and was going straight down the road through the parking lot. At this point I got a little nervous, but I saw a person heading toward it and figured he would grab it. He was pushing a cart toward the store, looked at the cart rolling with some speed now through the parking lot alone, walked within a few inches of it, and just let it keep rolling!
Now let me point out, this was at 9 at night, and other than the guy, there was nobody else around, and no cars moving in the lot. He was the only person at all, so there is no way he didn't see the cart. If he simply would have reached out his hand, he could have grabbed it, but he didn't.
At this point I start to think I should do something. The cart is slowly heading toward a main road, and if it were to make it, the exit of the parking lot is steep and has trees by it. Translation, the cart would pick up speed, come flying out from behind the trees, and probably cause a major traffic accident. Once again the cart is heading toward a curb, and I'm hopeing it will hit. But it doesn't. At this point I decided to take action. I turned on the headlights and floor it, race up and cut the cart off with my car. Fortunately, it had stopped right before I got to it, otherwise I might not have made it in time.
Why is this extremely boring story interesting? Because it showed me just how lazy, apathetic, and detached(in a bad way) we have all become. Would it be that insane for us to recognize other people and events outside our own little world? We are each so caught up in our own little dramas, that we never see the big picture. At least, not until its too late. The gym is one of the best places to see what I'm talking about. Every time I got there, I ride the eliptical rider for 65 minutes. And while I read, I notice the people around me. We are all right there, just feet from each other, and yet, its as though we don't know those around us exist. And eye contact! Oh no, anything but eye contact!!! That would mean we actually do recognize there are other people on the planet!
Don't get me wrong, I'm not bashing others, I'm mainly talking about myself here. I mean, people could have died tonight, and in at least some sense, it would have been my fault. Why? Because I was to lazy, to afraid, to apathetic to stop a simple shopping cart. Why? Oh no, that would look weird! A guy drives up in a cart to stop a cart from rolling through a parking lot? Sounds like the beginning of a bad joke. But I of all people should not even have those thoughts. I'm striving to be the non-attached, enlightened, pursuer of truth. Yet I'm so terrified of other people I hesitate to do the right thing when there are lives at stake.
I can't help but keep thinking of the classic case of bystander apathy we learn about in psychology. Were there was a girl who was attacked in an apartment complex, and after 20 or 30 people started looking, the attacker ran off. But then, no police came, no one went to help the girl, and so the guy came back and finished her off. Simply by walking out on the balcony and saying, "Hey, leave her alone." they might have scared off the assailant. Calling the cops might have helped too. But everyone assumed someone else would do it. It wasn't there problem. And they just stood and watched a girl get murdered.
Now, its easy for all of us to stand back and say we would have done something. But here was a complex were AT LEAST 30 people witnessed the incident, and did nothing about it. On the one hand in turns my stomach to think people can be so blatantly stupid. On the other hand, a similar event just happened to me! Who am I to say anything, I was tested and failed just the same. I know what you are thinking, "it was just a cart, nobody would have gotten hurt." And maybe that is true, but it was also possible for the cart to run out in the road and result in a major traffic accident that could have killed multiple people. Obviously I should have acted. When I think about it now, there is no reason I should have waited so long. The instant the last guy didn't stop the cart, I should have head toward it to stop it. Just in case. I mean, I was just sitting there watching it happen like I was watching a movie. It took everything I had to snap out of it and chase down the cart.
So the moral of the story is this; I had a little satori tonight and realized that I am FAR to controlled by those around me. How can I expect others to change when I am so controlled myself? Therefore I will make a concious effort from this point forward to break the binding chains of social influence. Not to be rebelious, but to be who I truely am. I refuse to feel so helpless again, when I have the ability to act at my disposal. I hope you all will do the same.
Meanwhile, I'm sitting in the car thinking the same thing. It looked as though it would hit a curb, but then it turned slightly and was going straight down the road through the parking lot. At this point I got a little nervous, but I saw a person heading toward it and figured he would grab it. He was pushing a cart toward the store, looked at the cart rolling with some speed now through the parking lot alone, walked within a few inches of it, and just let it keep rolling!
Now let me point out, this was at 9 at night, and other than the guy, there was nobody else around, and no cars moving in the lot. He was the only person at all, so there is no way he didn't see the cart. If he simply would have reached out his hand, he could have grabbed it, but he didn't.
At this point I start to think I should do something. The cart is slowly heading toward a main road, and if it were to make it, the exit of the parking lot is steep and has trees by it. Translation, the cart would pick up speed, come flying out from behind the trees, and probably cause a major traffic accident. Once again the cart is heading toward a curb, and I'm hopeing it will hit. But it doesn't. At this point I decided to take action. I turned on the headlights and floor it, race up and cut the cart off with my car. Fortunately, it had stopped right before I got to it, otherwise I might not have made it in time.
Why is this extremely boring story interesting? Because it showed me just how lazy, apathetic, and detached(in a bad way) we have all become. Would it be that insane for us to recognize other people and events outside our own little world? We are each so caught up in our own little dramas, that we never see the big picture. At least, not until its too late. The gym is one of the best places to see what I'm talking about. Every time I got there, I ride the eliptical rider for 65 minutes. And while I read, I notice the people around me. We are all right there, just feet from each other, and yet, its as though we don't know those around us exist. And eye contact! Oh no, anything but eye contact!!! That would mean we actually do recognize there are other people on the planet!
Don't get me wrong, I'm not bashing others, I'm mainly talking about myself here. I mean, people could have died tonight, and in at least some sense, it would have been my fault. Why? Because I was to lazy, to afraid, to apathetic to stop a simple shopping cart. Why? Oh no, that would look weird! A guy drives up in a cart to stop a cart from rolling through a parking lot? Sounds like the beginning of a bad joke. But I of all people should not even have those thoughts. I'm striving to be the non-attached, enlightened, pursuer of truth. Yet I'm so terrified of other people I hesitate to do the right thing when there are lives at stake.
I can't help but keep thinking of the classic case of bystander apathy we learn about in psychology. Were there was a girl who was attacked in an apartment complex, and after 20 or 30 people started looking, the attacker ran off. But then, no police came, no one went to help the girl, and so the guy came back and finished her off. Simply by walking out on the balcony and saying, "Hey, leave her alone." they might have scared off the assailant. Calling the cops might have helped too. But everyone assumed someone else would do it. It wasn't there problem. And they just stood and watched a girl get murdered.
Now, its easy for all of us to stand back and say we would have done something. But here was a complex were AT LEAST 30 people witnessed the incident, and did nothing about it. On the one hand in turns my stomach to think people can be so blatantly stupid. On the other hand, a similar event just happened to me! Who am I to say anything, I was tested and failed just the same. I know what you are thinking, "it was just a cart, nobody would have gotten hurt." And maybe that is true, but it was also possible for the cart to run out in the road and result in a major traffic accident that could have killed multiple people. Obviously I should have acted. When I think about it now, there is no reason I should have waited so long. The instant the last guy didn't stop the cart, I should have head toward it to stop it. Just in case. I mean, I was just sitting there watching it happen like I was watching a movie. It took everything I had to snap out of it and chase down the cart.
So the moral of the story is this; I had a little satori tonight and realized that I am FAR to controlled by those around me. How can I expect others to change when I am so controlled myself? Therefore I will make a concious effort from this point forward to break the binding chains of social influence. Not to be rebelious, but to be who I truely am. I refuse to feel so helpless again, when I have the ability to act at my disposal. I hope you all will do the same.
posted by Sean at
9:56 PM
1 Comments:
But you did do right. You evaluated the situations, watched what was going to happen and then decided to take action because no one else was going to. You didn't just sit there and not react! Everyone, now a days would have been scared...maybe the guys would have come after you, maybe someone would have stopped the cart, and after you relized it was safe,,,you did the appropriate thing. What if you had not floored it and the cart had kept going and went into the street and killed just one person? You have so much good in you but you also have "sense enough" to know not to act on impulse..like someone I know. You learned a valuable lesson and it is too bad everyone doesn't do that. I probably would have tried to help the girl and probably gotten myself killed too, because I act on impulse...and not good sense or judgement. Be very proud of yourself and keep on keeping on. M.O.M.
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Anonymous, at 11:55 AM
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